Monthly Archives: May 2017

Sleep is for Suckers!

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I cant sleep! 

but I don’t know if I want to anymore. 

My nightmares have been so horrible 

that I just want to avoid them all together.

I usually find peace in my sleep. 

It’s the only time my mind really stops running 

….for the most part. 

Lately it has been nightmare after nightmare. 

Re-traumatizing myself night after night. 

I’m ready for it stop and disappear.

I want my sanctuary back! 

I’m tired of the tears that lead up to my slumber.

I’m tired of preparing my mind for all the mental pain i’m about to endure.

I already suffer through that enough during the day.

Something that I once looked forward too, I now want to avoid.

I wonder how much sleep ill get tonight?

Maybe i’ll just pull an all nighter, I rather suffer through my thoughts wide awake 

then put myself through hell at night.

At least i’m prepared for that.

My nightmares are so unpredictable, I cant even close my eyes for a second without getting terrified.

I’m over it!

Pshh, who needs sleep anyway?!

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Comfortably Uncomfortable

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 Have you noticed how life gets so comfortable?

You get comfortable with yourself…

Other people…

Your surroundings….

ACTUAL BREATHING !

I’m a victim of becoming comfortable.

I’ve gotten comfortable with my problems

Comfortable with going back to the negative mind-set I once was at

And comfortable just accepting it.

Everyday I wake up taking life for granted

But I tell myself its OK, you can work it out tomorrow…

Tomorrow comes, yet same old story

I don’t know how to express myself anymore…

I’ve become so numb to everything

Good or bad

I rather just not care

It’s like, whats the point?

I’m sure ill find out eventually, but that day isn’t today.

And i’m pretty sure it wont be tomorrow

But i’m betting on eventually.

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