In one of those moods!
Well obviously i am, because its the only time i blog.
I’m in my IMISSMYHUSBAND mood!
Which is a great change from my
Well today’s my husbands birthday
and i don’t know if that’s why I’m in a crappy mood
or if its because like all my kids are sick .
But I’m leaning towards the fact that hes not home
i just feel bad that he’s missed like everything for this deployment
all the holidays
our 1st wedding anniversary
My whole pregnancy
The birth of our daughter
the kids birthdays, my birthday, his birthday
Javon’s first day of school
Javon losing his first tooth
the kids growing up in general.
Its a lot to miss out on
and even though i know he’ll never admit it
cause he thinks he has balls of steel, which he doesn’t
I know hes secretly hurting.
I know it, cause I’m hurting for him.
Sometimes i wish i never corrupted him
Yes, that’s how i feel, like i corrupted him
His intentions were to leave for basic with no girlfriend or anything
then he met me About 3 months before he was to leave
and i feel like, maybe things would be easier
for him if he didn’t meet me
cause now look it 3 years later and hes married with three kids
I’m pretty sure that was never in his plans
Now all the money he works so hard to make
[while hes over there and also home]
Goes towards all these necessities
That would be pointless to him if he never met me
I just wish something amazingly spectacular
Would happen for him.
He’s an amazing guy who tries and does so much for his family
Not many wives, fiances, girlfriends, spouses
can say that about the father of there children.
and i know your probably like
“yeah, yea, yeah every girl says that about he person there with!”
well I’m not just saying it to say it
or just trying to make him look good
cause he can do that all on his own ;D
but hes really legit
and i couldn’t be luckier
I’m so thankful for him
and wouldn’t of wanted my life to go any other way
and i hope he feels the same way about choosing me!
I love you baby
Ill take a drink just for you ;D
*Btw everyone should listen to, Hearts Burst into Fire by Bullet For My valentine! Thats what totally triggered my blog post for today.